The Spirit of Ramadan - Part 2

When my husband came back home the other day asking me whether I had finally decided to fast after reading my previous article, I told him that I was not especially looking at food and drink as restrictions, but that I was rather interested in the spiritual aspects of Ramadan.

 

But still, appreciating Ramadan "as a full package" means taking all aspects seriously, including fasting, so I considered my options and my starting points: I cannot manage a day without drinking a lot of water, or I systematically get a headache; I cannot do without a certain amount of caffeine (at least a morning cup of coffee or tea) or I spend the rest of the day yawning; I need to leave my house in the morning with some cereals in my stomach or I get grumpy for the rest of the day.

 

Let's say that I am not making it easy on myself from the beginning and that I seriously look for problems. Let's say also that I am the greatest person to find excuses. So I read and listened, and got suggested to start small and simple: do not eat but keep drinking water and juice. But I also have a voice in mind constantly reminding me that "there's no middle way if you take such decisions: either you do it 100%, or you don't".

 

I tried, and to be honest it did not work that well. Eventually my stomach reminded me I was not prepared for it. However, walking around outside (in the streets or in the public transports) allowed me couple of times to push my limits, mainly because there was just no other choice. I also tried to go for the "less-guilty alternative" (eating a fruit instead of a proper meal) to fill my stomach. But still, this is cheating, and even though there are maybe 10 days left to give it a try, I already appreciate the failure.

 

And then I ended up reading the Pan-Arabian Enquirer, and laughed: I did not expect to get a good lesson from a satirical article.

 

I need here to quote the first lines from this morning's article, "Expat still pretending she’s fasting for Ramadan" :

 

"DUBAI: Despite having given up her efforts to fast less than two hours into the first day of Ramadan, Suzie Bramble is still attempting to convince colleagues that she’s going without food or drink during daylight hours.

“I just feel so spiritual inside, like my body and soul are going through a deep cleansing session,” the 35-year-old British expat explained to co-workers in the Dubai offices of MPK Financial Services while on her way to the bathrooms with her pockets stuffed with biscuits. "

 

Yes, I did say in my previous post that I started "embracing the Spirit of Ramadan"; now I just feel like hiding until Eid. I do not like pointing at people, and I just cannot throw the first stone at others when I feel that stupid. Well done, Mr. Enquirer: I got your lesson, and finally listened to the voice in my mind.

 

But let me defend myself at least one last time: I will probably not fast this year or any in the future; however I'll keep on thinking about Ramadan in general,about the Friday  sermons, about food waste on iftar, about traffic hell on Ramadan hours, about peace and quiet at the gym, and about the Iftar dinner at the Burj-Al-Arab on Friday.

 

The Spirit of Ramadan

 When i was small, Ramadan was synonym of trouble.

Raised in a highly old-fashion neighbourhood in Paris, and even though it was only 20 years ago, I can tell you there were not that many Muslims in the district. At this time, Ramadan had no spiritual meaning to us: it mainly meant that our neighbours upstairs would get a lot of visitors, make smelly food and party all night long, and that us little white kids would not sleep much for a month. No need to say that it would "get worse" during winter when night was longer than day. To summarize, let's say that, by then, there was no real cultural exchange and knowledge sharing, and that the respect and community spirit you would expect on this month were non-existing.

And then the father of the family passed away because of cancer. We never heard the family party again, but instead they got a bird that would sing in the courtyard each morning.

I moved to Dubai a year ago, a  few weeks before Ramadan started. Again, for a newcomer in the region, this month was a tough one. Even though I was working from home, once in a while I was going in and out the house by 45°, without having the right to even drink a drop. Once I even almost fainted in the elevator, due to heat shock. Poor newcomer I was.

And then something happened this year. Like a spiritual, cultural epiphany whose source I cannot really identify. This year, I think I've learned more about traditions, about daily stages, about prayers. Even though I had learned much from Muslim friends and colleagues in the past years, I think that this year especially I opened my heart and my mind like never. The events of the past weeks possibly had an impact on my "spiritual opening". But being curious about local traditions probably made the change.

 

Newspapers in the region cover Ramadan on a daily basis. First they review the moon sighting and lessons from astrologists; then they develop the do's and don'ts that people should respect, especially expats; then a great share covers diet practices (how to loose weight, how not to jump on food on Iftar etc...); the rest covers crazy driving and accidents. Each Friday, you can read in English a statement from the prayer sermon; during Ramadan the sermon expands its message to all days.

 

I do believe that things can make sense if you want to embrace them through another filter. Ramadan is a month of peace, sharing, understanding, forgiveness. Fasting is not about restricting yourself to listen to religious dictatorship; it gives you on the contrary an idea of what others might experience, and what you have "in extra" in your life. In the past days I've considered fasting as well and see what I could gain from it on the spiritual level. I am spending most of the day on water and juice, but don't eat until my body reaches its limits, even though it's still daylight, and especially when walking under 45°.

 

After all, it is just the contrary of my childhood's experience. I just had no idea by then that I would embrace a religion myself and one day compare it to Islam. Growing up sometimes gives you a better understanding of what goes on around you.



Grey

I consider myself a “grey” person.

You’re wondering why I picked this colour, although I generally wear blue, or white, or pink on a daily basis?

One can argue (or agree) that grey is the right compromise between my fairly pale skin tone mixed with the potential of darkness my mind can develop (not even talking about my teenage favourite style of music, the make-up and the insomniac lines around my eyes). My blue eyes sometimes turn grey, depending on the light and the emotions.

I consider myself a “grey” person because I was raised and trained to develop critical analysis and reach consensus. To me, nothing is black or white: even though I can get fairly enthusiastic about one side or the other of a story, I need to consider black and white before deciding. That also means that I sometimes decide NOT to decide, which is often perceived as a weakness. I on the other hand call it “understanding the big picture”.

I was proposed a few times to engage in politics. But as the happiest devil’s advocate, I just smiled as an answer. I was asked many times about my opinion on societal matters. I bail and refer my interlocutor to different articles. I am the best alibi you could pick to hide yourself against anything: not that I am a liar, but I will consider the options and behave accordingly.

I live in a place now where cultural exchanges thrive, as much as subsequent misunderstandings, clichés, fears. I’ve been through a lot of phases in the past months, where I empowered these misunderstandings, clichés and fears, but not against the other but rather against myself.  After a year in the region however, I’ve washed all of the above to embrace the blue of the sky, the yellowish orange of the sand, and the grey of my mind.

And for those wondering whether I feel grey because I’ve enjoyed “50 Shades…”, nope I haven’t read it and don’t ever plan to do so. Unless I decide to apply my grey matter for science. Who knows.

What's up, dude?

When i opened this blog, I thought I would mainly use it to share with you, relatives, friends and unknown people around, my everyday life here in the Emirates as an involuntary housewife. I had a format in mind, I had story to tell, I had pictures to take, I had impressions to share. For those who had not expected my silence, let's say that life had hit me sufficiently hard in the past months to give my brain some rest, and that I did not expect my own silence, either.

And the ideas are still there, do not worry. I want to talk about my driving licence, about my crazy neighbours and their monster kid, about the maid, about my nail polish and the urban plans of Dubai Municipality (what about another amusement park or another mall?^^). I want to share my feelings on Ramadan, which will start next week and that I plan to appreciate from a different (but rather more peaceful) perspective. So yes, I've removed the layer of dust from my lonely keyboard, I've thought a little, and I am back on track.

But to make it easier to follow the succession of ideas, it's important to quickly come back to what happened in the past months. I hope you're fine with bullet points, I had thought of preparing a ppt presentation but I thought I would be a little too much (just kidding of course). Here you go, let's go backwards a little to the main events:

• January: I officially turned into a real housewife, I officially passed y UAE driving licence.
• February: I started looking for jobs and went to my first interviews; but to be honest I seriously enjoy my book-and-starbucks afternoons.
• March: I spent snowy days in Paris watching my sister die. I am stuck with images of the hospital and the funerals, but thank god I had beloved ones by my side. Nothing in the world can replace a husband or a best friend.
• April: Recovery time back in the UAE, looking at the Marina Mall while eating pizza on my balcony. No better way to calm my insomnias than reading even more, night after night, and sending even more applications. I changed my approach and decided not to give a F anymore (= let's not apply to apply, but let's aim at what I really want)
• May: I lost my father-in-law and my grand-father within few days, both great men that I respected and loved truly. I can't remember how many trains I took, but I surfed enough between my homes to know the train schedule. I attended 3 funerals in a week, and rested some time in the quiet and fresh air. More reading.
• June: I nailed my recovery, mixed feelings between denial, peace and fear. I applied even more, and met fantastic people. I have cried a lot, I have smiled a lot. And I got a job.
• July: my monthly horoscope is awesome.

So yes, I am officially NOT a housewife anymore, and my visa will even change. But plans have NOT changed, I will keep on telling you local stories.

Just remember: life is a learning process, and you have a big role in making it the way you want it to be. Making no sense? Well, follow July's Virgo and maybe you'll get it.

World Environment Day 2013

Believe it or not, on this day, I will not be using my cynical tone and disappointed words. On the contrary, this time I anticipated a little and made some research online to see what is going on around me.

Today is World Environment Day 2013, and to my (positive) surprise much is actually going on.

With the motto "Think.Eat.Save", this year's WED invites everyone to reconsider your relation to food, to prevent food waste and food loss and thus reduce your footprint on an everyday basis. I like this approach so much: Not only you are what you eat, but I believe you are also what you waste.

What you cook, what you put on your plate, what you trash, all this has an obvious impact on the environment and on the others. The UN Environment Programme (UNEP) gives basic numbers that can help anyone understand where he/she stands, food-wise:

"If food is wasted, it means that all the resources and inputs used in the production of all the food are also lost. For example, it takes about 1,000 litres of water to produce 1 litre of milk and about 16,000 litres goes into a cow’s food to make a hamburger. The resulting greenhouse gas emissions from the cows themselves, and throughout the food supply chain, all end up in vain when we waste food"

This time I am extremely pleased to see that the topic is well covered in the news and corporate world. I am not sure the coffees and restaurants in JBR will address food production and waste in their daily menus; however newspapers pinpoints important aspects that deserve attention.

Pic: Khaleej Time

The Khaleej Times for instance reminds that "According to the UN Food and Agriculture Organisation (FAO), 1.3 billion tonnes of food is wasted every year. This is equivalent to the amount of food produced in the whole of sub-Saharan Africa."  Local authorities are also fully aware that tones of food are discarded during Ramadan, and that families should engage in the "3 Re" (Re-use, Reduce, Recycle) actively to promote more sustainable lifestyles. The message is here, the message is clear.

Dubai Municipality also engaged in a survey to try and collect information of its residents and estimate their
ecological footprint. I doubt the response rate was high, but the concept, the concern is worth mentioning.

More decided to launch new projects on this specific date:

The National puts forward The Goumbook-Gecostore, the "green connection" to purchase sustainable products online, from cosmetics to LED lamps.

AME Info goes for PTL Solar, "one of the region's leading solar energy solutions provider, brings a unique concept of going green with launching SOLCART, the first ever portable solar energy source powered by independent solar off-grid systems".

So yes, today, when I read all this, I have hope and I look forward to the next move.

"And that was enough to make me feel infinite"

Like my father wisely said, life hasn't been easy or fair to me this spring. Fair enough, indeed I had my share and i don't mind taking some time for myself. So far my manucure holds, but i still feel this strange impression to be lost while looking by the window from my 28th floor.

But I probably got used to the rythm of Dubai, after my one-year anniversary here. Because the first thing I wanted to look at, at 3am, was the construction sites down my residence and see how they have progressed after 3 weeks away from the country. I know things generally move fast around, and i was not deceived: the tram station is now built, and another floor of the tower's foundation is ready. There is a new spa, a new tailor, a new kindergarten, and the community gym should be ready soon.

There is just an obvious impression of being disconnected, each time I come back here. It is not especially a bad feeling: it is a strange mix between ecstasy and vertigo. The point is, you just need to understand it and make sure you're in the right mindset, to surf on these two feelings without falling into one particularly.

Fortunately, I have things to look forward to, preventing me from staring at the towers for no reasons, with no purpose. I am willing to end my housewife status soon, more than anything. Don't take me wrong, sleeping late, hanging out at The Walk, and caring about nothing, all this is quite pleasant. But it's not me, it's not what I had in mind when moving here. But until I sign something, I will keep on looking by my window and wait for the city to change.

Because I was standing in the tunnel. And I was really there.